Jack FM Gazette – January 2024
Jack FM Gazette – January 2024
January, 2024 • Vol. 2, Issue 1
JACK FM – Quantum Computing What We Want
Oh No…MERCH Store Temporarily Closed
The Jack FM Merch store received an official notice to close due to a Mellencamp infestation. It was apparently caused from too many Kenny Loggins to our computer systems. That, in turn, created dangerous Radiohead waves that turned our Soft Cell into Led Zepplin poisoning.
All of this caused Weezering and Tears for Fears amongst our Men At Work who were trying to stop the infestation, but WHAM! it got them every time. As a result, The Police and our lawyer Mr. Mister of the firm of Hall & Oates has advised us on a proper Fixx to The Cure for the problem we created by removing all of the merch inventory.
But have “No Doubt” that JACK FM will reopen our Merch store and give a free CAKE with every New Order of Jack FM Merch. Stay tuned as we burn the Midnight Oil and have a grand reopening for the entire Human League in 2024.
Dearest Jack,
How do you define the term “We” in the phrase Playing What We Want? My friends just can’t seem to wrap their heads around it.
Sincerely,
We Want to Know
Dear We Want to Know,
Technically, there are no right or wrong definitions of “WE” in Playing What We Want. It can mean everyone, or it could refer to an exclamation of fun as if you’re on a roller coaster, like Weeeee! Or it could just be a sneaky way for us to include you in our subliminal messaging.
Jack FM has comics...
TOON Of The Month
Jack FM Merch Manager
Oooo….a retail gig! Yep, this one is almost as exciting as working at Blockbuster in the 90s! Do you know how to create a JACK online experience, choose great Merch, fulfill orders, and help customers? NOPE, no problem. Excellent benefits and No Requests.
Jack FM Social Greeter
Do you have what it takes to wear a Jack FM vest? Know lots of dad-jokes? Are you great at asking people if they need help? Then you’re perfect for our new position of JACK FM Social Greeter. Must have a Saccharin smile and an enthusiastic “WELCOME TO JACK FM” vocal delivery. Apply today with your best attention-getting greeting. Don’t forget your name, nickname, silly nickname, or fun rhyme for us to remember you by.
Writers needed. Duh. Have you read this JACK FM Gazette? Contact us and give us a sample. NOT THAT KIND OF SAMPLE…GROSS.
VISIT US
